With shoddy and non-inclusive sex and relationships education, minimal queer representation in mainstream pop culture, and a high chance you'll be verbally or physically assaulted for being visibly LGBTQ+ in public, it's no wonder many queer people don't realise they're not straight until later in life. Here, women explain the obvious signs they were bisexual, pansexual or a lesbian when they were younger that now make them be like, "D'oh!".
1."Choosing crushes, especially crushes that I knew most of the other girls wouldn't like because they were 'effeminate'." [via]
2."My friends' boyfriends (and later, husbands) were never good enough for them." [via]
3."Being bored/annoyed/disgusted by naked men on TV shows and in movies." [via]
4."Just generally not knowing what attraction meant and therefore being 'into' any man who gave me attention - and then terrified if he wanted to date and/or touch me." [via]
5."I always had crushes on unavailable men (gay, fuckboys, emotionally unavailable)." [via]
6."I watched porn just for the women." [via]
7."I was very indifferent and unemotional towards boyfriends. Even after being intimate I would try to friend zone them. I would only stay with them because I felt guilty and I never saw a future with any of them." [via]
8."Becoming really nervous around a certain girl, dreaming about her constantly, but imagining it was only because I admired her confidence." [via]
9."The intensity of my female friendships. Now I can see they were those obsessive types of crushes." [via]
10."Wanting to dress in a style that I now recognise as pretty gay, but always editing it a bit because I felt like I should dress more 'girly'." [via]
11."Being absolutely disgusted with blow jobs. I had to psych myself up to actually do them, fake moaning and all to make sure the guys didn't realise I was actually just trying not to be sick." [via]
12."Multiple dreams over a lifetime of having sex and making out with girls/women." [via]
13."Being super into everything about a hetero relationship except for the sex. I always dreaded that. Although it felt good, it was a chore for me." [via]
14."Being an invested LGBTQ ally. I wrote both school theses on LGBTQ people, marched in pride parades, etc." [via]
15."Thinking that queer people were the coolest people on Earth and lamenting the fact I wasn't cool enough to hang out with them." [via]
16."Never understanding the standard celebrity crushes." [via]
17."Thinking women were obviously and objectively nicer to look at." [via]
18."Having 'friend crushes' on girls I briefly met because 'they just seem so fun to be friends with'." [via]
19."Zero interest in boy bands, unlike the rest of the girls I knew." [via]
20."I looked at all the hot girls in school with awe (which was really hot crushes)." [via]
21. "Somehow I 'accidentally' got naked with a suspicious number of my friends, like talking two different girls into showering with me 'because it's faster and I don't want you to use all the hot water' or skinny dipping 'because it would be so much fun to go swimming but I don't have a bathing suit' or using the bathroom/changing clothes and 'forgetting to close the door'." [via]
22."Wanting to kiss my female friends when drinking." [via]
